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Getting To Sleep:
The 3 Faces Of Relaxation
Anyone can get to sleep fast using this process,
even people with insomnia.
During the last few years, I have helped many clients with
insomnia learn how to get to sleep. One client claimed that he had not had
a good night sleep in 9 years, even when using sleeping pills! Most of these
clients used to be transport truck drivers. They got very good at staying
awake... well, kind of awake. The rest of the clients were anxious to solve
various day to day problems. In all cases there was some depression. At the
very least they were depressed about not sleeping (staying awake).
Although we often think of insomnia as a sleep problem,
the problem is actually in the awake state.
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Anxious type client believes that solving problems requires conscious
internal processing. Thinking about unresolved problems causing insomnia,
becomes another problem requiring conscious internal processing. In NLP
this is called a calibrated loop.
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Driver type client is very adept at using conscious internal processing
to stay awake. Often these clients spent large amounts of time in
a trance like state. You know the kind I mean, where you are there but
not really there until something happens that you have to pay outward
attention to. Most of these client also remember an imprinting event that
screams "STAY AWAKE" in their mind.
Here's what I tell them:
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It's OK to sleep.
IT IS OK TO SLEEP, you are safe, you will be OK and problems will be easier
to manage as a result of sleeping. Ever hear "let me sleep on it"? Your
unconscious mind is more capable than you at reviewing and sorting information
while you sleep. Re-lax. Time to be lax again. It's OK to forget about all
that important stuff for a night, each night.
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Be awake when you need
to be awake. Being half asleep when you should be awake, is the same
as being half awake when you should be asleep. If you are in a mode that
conserves energy while you disassociate, get back in here. Find something
to occupy your mind that is outside of your mind. If you are thinking of
problems, write them down along with your ideas and musings. If you work
at a brain dead job, pay attention instead of daydreaming or get a different
job. If you are not working, get a project to work on. Avoid simmering through
your day, get a head of steam, crank up the heat to the Boyleying point.
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The easiest way to get your conscious internal processing
to shut up and let you sleep, is to give it something to do that helps your
mind relax. Focus on letting 3 waves of deep relaxation
spread over your scalp and face. Think about letting go of all the tension
in your scalp, your face and your jaw. Think about the deep relaxation spreading
over your scalp and face and pay close attention, you want to notice when
you feel each of the 3 waves of deep relaxation spreading over your scalp
and face. If your mind wanders onto other things, come back to paying attention
to feeling each of the waves of deep relaxation spreading over your scalp
and face. After you feel the first wave, you might notice yourself thinking
"It cant relax more than this" but it does! Continue to pay attention
and wait for the second wave of relaxation. After the second relaxing wave,
you probably won't notice the third wave relaxing you into blissful sleep.
After a little practice, this process has provided insomniac
clients with the ability to sleep anytime and anywhere they want to. Many
people find that simply using step 3 above, makes it easy for them to get
to sleep fast.
Enjoy,
Steve Boyley.
Licensed Trainer of NLP.
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